"My Grandma"

Yesterday was my grandma's 86th birthday!! (although last year she claimed dyslexia and said she was turning 58 - instead of 85- so I guess this year she is "59".)

Anyways, I mentioned this to my classes yesterday... which brought on an onslaught of grandma comments and stories! here are some of my favorites...

~ I told them that my grandma is very creative and artistic. The response from one boy was, "My grandma is nothing like your grandma."
"Oh is she not creative?" I asked.
"Nope, she's a smoker and a gambler."

~"My grandma hates cigarettes. Because when she was little she tried a cigar and it made her cough a lot. So now she says she's allergic to alcohol. But then she told me about a bar she goes to get a beer each week, so I don't really believe that she's allergic to alcohol." (what does any of that have to do with any thing else said? no clue)

~ "My grandma bakes a lot! She bakes pan dulce... cheesecake... donuts... just anything."

~ "My grandma has 2 cats. One is named Blue, but that's not creative because it just looks blue."

~"I have 3 grandmas: one with 5 children, one young one, and one old one. Which one do you want to hear about?" "All of them," I reply.
"okay. Well the old one doesn't do anything. She just sits in the chair and she really likes Pizza Hut."
"The young one cooks a lot. She makes cheese toast and cheese crackers and cake and anything."
He was interrupted with, "Does she make donuts?"
"Nope, maybe you can give her the recipe. And the one with 5 children, well she just has trouble talking on the phone because she has to yell at all 5 kids every 2 seconds. - then he puts on his mean grandma voice - GO TO BED. - sweet voice - now what were you saying??"

Unbelievable... note to self - kids listen!! Be careful what you say in front of them!! You never know when they will pass it on!